7 Pieces of Advice for Adoptive Parents

ByKim Anderson
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7 Pieces of Advice for Adoption

Have you been considering adopting a child?  I followed up with my friend Angie  to ask what advice she would give to parents that are in the midst of beginning or thinking about the adoption process.  She gave me some great feedback that we hope will help you as you approach adopting a sweet child of your own.  If you’d like to read Angie’s single mother adoption story, please click here to view her post.  Here are 7 pieces of advice for adoptive parents from Angie.  She’s a woman who has been there and done that, twice!

  1. Tell everybody you are wanting to adopt! You never know who may know someone who is looking for a family looking to adopt.
  2. Ask lots of questions. Whether you are working directly with the birth mother, attorney, or adoption agency, make sure you keep yourself informed. There really is no stupid question! Chances are someone else may be wondering the same thing. Open adoption means different things to everybody.
  3. Learn the lingo! Home study, portfolio, open adoption, power of attorney, legal guardian, etc. – they can be overwhelming and even scary if you are unprepared when terms pop up you’re unfamiliar with. Legal documents are filled with these phrases and more.
  4. Be honest about everything!!! Not the time to hide skeletons in the closet and yet be tactful about airing your dirty laundry.
  5. Be prepared to share the experience. Some may even want to be apart of planning things. My daughter’s birth mother wanted to see the nursery and helped to decorate. Both my children’s birth mother’s gave my children their middle names.
  6. Allow yourself to get excited! Birth mothers want and need to see your joy and excitement. I was afraid to express my excitement because I was thinking of the difficult choice she was making, I thought I was being respectful. Thankfully a mutual friend told me she was concerned I was going to change my mind. I started sharing my plans and joy with the birth mother and she asked to be involved. I will cherish those moments together forever, they are wonderful memories I can share with my daughter.
  7. Lastly have a great support system I’m place. Let these close family or friends in on your journey. Share the ups and downs, the joys and sorrows, the hopes and fears. Let them know you need their support and ask that they in return express any of their frustrations, doubts, fears, or negative thoughts with others instead of with you. Have a support system that is there to lift you up not pull you down. Enjoy the journey no matter how long or short. They are worth all of it!

I hope that you found these tips helpful as you pursue advice for adoptive parents.  They are simple things that I learned along my own path to parenthood.